tammeike-sanno (g-06) to ginza (g-09). transfer to the hibiya line, where ginza is h-08. seven stops away at h-15 is akihabara, where electronics meet sex. it's nicknamed electronic city, because of the sheer inundation of huge stores that line its streets. i was here on wednesday afternoon with romich, each of us in search for a particular device. dave needed some sort of bnc connector, while i was in the process of searching for a camera for my aunt diane. she really wants a nikon coolpix, and i was doing some pricing for her. turns out the camera was cheaper in shibuya, where i bought it today. but that's besides the point. after coming up from the subway, we walked into one of the giant stores and wow. it seemed to continue as far as the eye could see and had at least ten floors. even on a wednesday afternoon, it was still teeming with people. and i'm still stunned by the variety of bright colors that are everywhere here. the japanese surely are not ashamed of being bold and outspoken. outside, there were several anime characters with holes cut out for their heads. needless to say, many pics were taken - one of which is my new facebook profile pic. that pic was taken outside of one of the largest sex shops in akihabara, and dave and i obviously went in. about three feet inside the door, there was a video playing - with sound. god forbid a little kid ever unknowingly poke his head inside a sex store. but as for us, it was pretty frickin' awesome. 7 floors of literally everything you could imagine. and yet again, for a wednesday afternoon, it was pretty packed. i'll only highlight one item of interest from this store: an innocent-looking bottle of suntory (a popular brand here) green iced tea. or so you thought. because it was totally lube. we thought about buying it as a gag gift for someone but ultimately decided against it. down the street, we went in another store, where the adult section was actually underground. typically, when you see dvd's of this nature in the states, it's pretty obvious that they're porn dvd's - privates blocked out, girls flashing you, etc. something obvious. and there was no shortage of those images in this shop. however, i was particularly taken by the videos that, on the front, had a well-photographed shot of a young, cute girl dressed in a schoolgirl's outfit, standing in a park or walking down the street. the other side clearly showed what these little girls were capable of, but the one that struck our fancy had a close-up taken of her, seductively masticating a french fry. totally hot. alas, french fry girl remained on the shelf as well. but the sheer expanse of videos in just these two stores was unreal. and that was two of several dozen. just outside, there were girls dressed as maids attempting to lure you upstairs to their den for a little afternoon spring cleaning. oh man, i loved akihabara. too bad we had a show wednesday night. however, things quickly took as an unexpected turn, as i ended up in jail.
matos saw a sign close to the theater that looked like a clothing store, but the gate was always down in the middle of the day. perplexed, he happened to pass this place later on in the evening on wednesday and went inside. he came to the theatre that night and told the band what he had found. and it was the best mistake-turned-awesome finding of his life. so after the show, romich, james, saori and i joined matos at this awesome restaurant called the lock up. from ground level, you go down a flight of stairs and before you know it, you're descending into a dark underworld. you finally get to the front door, turn left and trigger a guy who is now straining to break free from his chains behind bars. loud, sudden noises are happening all the time. the floor is uneven and jagged. there are multiple doors to open, only one of which leads into the restaurant proper. behind the others, as you might expect, are varying types of aliens and mummies. there must be cameras throughout this maze, because as soon as you slide open the correct door, a hot girl dressed as a cop is waiting for you and ushers you to the side in japanese. upon figuring out how many as in the party, we end up in this waiting area that resembles the inside of a rib cage. after a minute or so, the hot girl cop reappears. WITH HANDCUFFS!!!! two members of the party must be handcuffed together and forcibly dragged through the restaurant by the hot girl cop, towards your table. the restaurant is a maze of low-hanging ceilings and walls lined with different sized jail cells. yes, you literally eat in a cell. i mean, the bars clang behind you and everything. shoes off, duck, sit indian-style and clang. you have been locked up, but with chopsticks and menus. the food is traditional japanese and reasonably priced (780 yen for fondue with 5 fried shrimp and 5 fried potato patties!), but the best part of the menu is the drinks, which are on the first few pages. drinks come in test tubes, beakers, syringes - all sorts of mad scientist containers. and in all sorts of imaginable bright-colored dyes - reds, blues, greens. you can even get these plastic capsules that are filled with some super-strong vodka, must be 100 or 120 proof, that really stings when you bite into them. but they're only 100 yen apiece! it's another push-the-button-to-call-the-waitress kind of place, and she is dressed as a fellow convict or inmate. add that to the fact that there is a wide range of music playing - r&b to heavy metal and all in all, you're probably thinking that prison ain't all it's cracked up to be. that is, until all the lights suddenly go out. black lights eventually kick in, as the music blares. intense heavy metal. gunshots blasting. sirens blaring. there's been a jailbreak! multiple inmates have broken out of their cells and begin harassing fellow inmates! yes, guys dressed in scary masks slam open your cell door, causing instant screams. the best are the ones that slowly open your door, peer in creepily, even walk into your cell and then jump out at you! this goes on for a solid, i don't know, five minutes or so, so you're always on edge until the music subsides and the regular lights return. unreal atmosphere. the entire place is a maze and even getting to and from the bathroom can be an ordeal. and once you get your bill from the waitress, you have to pay the cop up front. and if haven't counted your coins right and provided the correct amount, then they shoot you in cold blood. or so i've heard. ok, just kidding about the cold-blooded murder. instead, they reward you for having gotten out of jail with multiple 1,000-yen coupons! and you can use one per person on any return visit! in fact, matos and i loved the place so much on wednesday night that we went back for lunch between shows today (and took trevor) AND after the second show (and took cate). we told ourselves that we wouldn't go back unless we brought a new person(s). so i've been in cells 46, 45 and 47 in my first three visits to the lock up, and we're definitely going back tomorrow night. we got 8 coupons as we walked on last night, used 3 for lunch, got 4 more, used 3 for dinner, got 4 more - yeah, we've still got a whopping total of 10 coupons to use. that's 10,000 free yen that are just begging to be used. so hopefully, matos and i can round up 8 other convicts to go to the lock up tomorrow night. maybe this time, i'll commit a felony instead of a misdemeanor.
the ginza line shuts down a little after midnight every night, so the last three nights have ended in cabs. the base is 710 yen, and the price increases 90 yen every fraction of a mile. there's a cool 3 bars-2 bars-1 bar countdown that occurs right before the next hike, so at least you can brace yourself. but the best thing about cabs here is their automatic doors. that's right - when you approach a cab, the driver pushes a button, and the door literally swings open. and he closes it behind you without you lifting a finger. so convenient! last night's cab ride was priceless. well, not exactly, it was 2,420 yen. but the five of us managed to squeeze in. dave, james, dave and saori in the back. me up front. clearly, the four of them were squished but being in japan where everything is tinier, even i was squished up in the front seat with my knees banging up against the dashboard. saori was trying to explain to us all the things she does before even her boss gets in - things like purchasing tasty snacks for the green room (more on that to follow) and making coffee.
saori: "yeah, you guys really like a lot of sugar in your coffee, because i'm always buying more sugar. i like my coffee normal."
me: "oh, so you take it black?"
instant uproar in the cab. tonight's cab ride featured far fewer in the way of innuendoes, but instead a professional drummer and jazz singer in the form of our driver. he spoke pretty good english and told us about a visit to california last year to visit his uncle. when he realized we were musicians as well, he broke into a rendition of "i left my heart in san francisco." quite good for a late-night cab driver, i gotta say. ok, a couple of quick things before bed, since it's almost 4, and i've got another two-show day tomorrow before a fourth trip to the lock up in 48 hours. i went to mcdonald's a couple days ago, just because - and i naturally got something different, because i could obviously get a big mac back home any day. got a pretty tasty teriyaki mcburger for only 290 yen, with the sauce being quite similar to the tatsuya-style fried chicken sandwich i had at kfc last week. who knows when the next time i'll get to say that i had a unique sandwich at kfc japan is? also, the japanese producers are overly generous with their snacks. they're always leaving fun and exciting things to nibble on in the green room. cookies, crackers, custards. they outdid themselves today with what i called a green tea taco. it looks like a soft shell of a taco that's green wrapped around a gummi worm. so good. it seems as if they've been saying the best snacks for the end, so i'm excited about tomorrow's smorgasbord. hmmm, i'm a bit reserved about posting this now. i hope no one from the show has the time to read this tomorrow before the shows. i don't want to ruin the uniqueness of the lock up. cheesy? yes, but that's what makes it awesome. it's totally one of those places you have to experience to get the full effect of it. we were trying to compare it to someplace in nyc. perhaps mars 2112 (51st and b'way) or jekyll and hyde (57th and 6th) - two places i've never been to - but apparently, it's better than either of those. a place like this would kill in the states, especially a big market like new york. maybe matos and i should open up a chain in manhattan once this tour is over...
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